I’ve been typing this one in a middle of the night. I still don’t know what will I say through this but I just can’t help it. I want an outlet. And only writing will do. I can’t sleep. I still have a 7 am midterm exam tomorrow but something’s going on in my mind. I drank about 4 cups of coffee this day (because of problem sets) and I think that’s one of the reason why I can’t sleep.
Okay. I’ve been dreaming weird things lately. And that was actually why I am also being paranoid these days.
Guess what. It feels like I came back to those longing days. Those days without you. Those days that was just very disturbing. Those days where…….we didn’t even talk.
I don’t care if you’ll read this one day. Actually, I do wish that one time you’ll be bored and will suddenly thought of reading my blog. Cause we or you (?) don’t have time in talking at each other. Or chatting to be exact.
I’ve been dreaming of you. Actually it’ll be great for me but no. It’s about seeing you with another girl. I dunno that girl. Her face seems unfamiliar to me but I don’t care. It’s been on my dreams for how many nights and I think I’m going crazy thinking about it. I actually dunno what to do if ever that’ll happen. I dunno. I might be sick.
But yeah. I hate this feeling. I’m totally afraid that might happen but I still have this trust for you but on the other side I am thinking that, ‘hello, I am not even your girlfriend and we barely talk and I can’t remember when we actually see other like yeah’. I’ve been looking every night at my chatbox and seeing you online for hours ago and I was thinking like ‘I’ve been online for like whole day but still, you didn’t chat at me or even send stickers or hi?’
And every time when I was going home, I was like, looking at each side hoping that you’ll be around so that we can be together for even just few minutes but no. It’s not happening.
I dunno what’s happening. I guess it’s just that I miss you so bad and I hope we’ll talk (chat) to each other alot like what we used to.
Do well. I miss you.